Hey all...I'm going to ask...who here is going to convention and who is not? I'm pretty sure I'm going, but I'm very bummed that a couple of the guys that were originally going that I chat with on line are now not going. So...who is and who isn't?
Convention...Yes or No
No
Money is but one concern. Being in Sacramento and not being able to see my daughter is another. And I can't condone this traveling roadshow approach to the convention. Centrally located in the US, like in KC or anywhere else in the middle of the US, made more sense than throwing it all over the country. Smaller regional conventions make even more sense. And honestly, I don't see a point to it. I look at the break-out sessions and I ask, "Why?"
Basic hair braiding- youTube
Teaching our kids the value of money/Preparing our children for school/
Home fire safety and teaching emergency preparedness- All basic jobs of being a parent, and honestly if you need someone else to tell you how to do anything for your child, then you probably shouldn't have had kids in the first place. Take responsibility for being a dad rather than expecting society or someone else to tell you how you should to do it.
The open forums- How are these things not already accomplished right here on AHD.org?
And the scholarship? The one you still have to pay for in advance? How is that helping those that can't afford to attend?
The only thing vaguely interesting in my opinion is Dr. Rochlen's research, but that isn't enough.
Sorry gents, but I just don't get it, the need or the purpose of the convention. And before someone says the whole "it's a way to meet new people" schtick, again, isn't that what AHD.org and all the other SAHD websites are for?
-Will
gamingwithbaby.com | all your diapers are belong to us
my flickr
BRING BACK THE IRRELEVANCE!!!!
Sadly, no
Too much other mandatory travel in my life, but I'm glad people are doing this!
That said.. GWB, man, you are such a DRAG!
Let's take these one at a time, but for the money time away from kids, which I cannot disagree with..
Quote:
And I can't condone this traveling roadshow approach to the convention. Centrally located in the US, like in KC or anywhere else in the middle of the US, made more sense than throwing it all over the country. Smaller regional conventions make even more sense. And honestly, I don't see a point to it. I look at the break-out sessions and I ask, "Why?"
If there's going to be a national convention it certainly ought to move around. Moving lets new people connect with the convention. I'm organizing a 1200 person professional conference right now, and what do we do? Move around the country. You try to stick with places that are easy to travel to, you distribute your locations to respect the distribution of your audience, and you recognize that by moving you'll lose some people some years and get others in other years.
As for smaller regional: don't whine, do! (I expect to hear this from you, not to TELL you.)
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Basic hair braiding- youTube
You're shitting me, right? You gonna point your kids at YouTube to learn to tie their shoes? I'm not saying hair braiding is rocket science (or even shoe tying), but there's a difference between in person physical experience and a video. You want to be the first person to have his vasectomy done by Dr. Sawitontv? (Yes, the medical profession gives oodles of money to my CS colleagues to develop physical simulation systems for training and tele-operation, but that's exactly my point.)
I won't mention the fun, 'cause it doesn't sound like you're in the mood.
Quote:
Teaching our kids the value of money/Preparing our children for school/
Home fire safety and teaching emergency preparedness- All basic jobs of being a parent, and honestly if you need someone else to tell you how to do anything for your child, then you probably shouldn't have had kids in the first place. Take responsibility for being a dad rather than expecting society or someone else to tell you how you should to do it.
Again, you're shitting me. Again, I refer to your kids. Every kid should know arithmetic. What, you want me to TEACH you arithmetic? You lazy no-good kid? Don't rely on society or someone to TELL you about arithmetic, figure it out on your own!
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The open forums- How are these things not already accomplished right here on AHD.org?
In person is different. Do you think Alcoholics Anonymous is likely to switch to 100% online forums?
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And the scholarship? The one you still have to pay for in advance? How is that helping those that can't afford to attend?
Beats the heck out of me, but since I'm feeling curmudgeonly: you're WRONG, GWB, WRONG WRONG WRONG. I, uh.. just don't know why.
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Sorry gents, but I just don't get it, the need or the purpose of the convention. And before someone says the whole "it's a way to meet new people" schtick, again, isn't that what AHD.org and all the other SAHD websites are for?
Well, sure, but when I meet people online, I assume they're 12-year-old boys PRETENDING to be AHDs with military training.
Cheers,
Steve
(This message courtesy of a temporarily distracted baby girl.)
Steve
What gives you the right to personally attack me? And furthermore, you obviously didn't even bother to read or understand what I wrote. I am responsible for teaching my children and I don't need to attend a convention, or listen to some self-proclaimed "expert" on how to teach or raise them. And neither should anyone else who has kids. Anyone that wants kids needs to suck it the fuck up and be parents and not let society dictate or preach to them how to do their job.
-Will
gamingwithbaby.com | all your diapers are belong to us
my flickr
BRING BACK THE IRRELEVANCE!!!!
Sorry if you're offended GWB..
I do think the convention is a great opportunity, and do disagree with a lot of your arguments, but intended the tone to be amusing.
That said, people learn from each other. No one HAS to take anyone's advice, but just listening to advice doesn't mean you're letting "society dictate" to you.
And, if you want to tell everyone that such sessions aren't worthwhile, why can't I tell people they are?
Cheers,
Steve
(This message courtesy of a temporarily distracted baby girl.)
Quote:honestly if you need
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honestly if you need someone else to tell you how to do anything for your child, then you probably shouldn't have had kids in the first place. Take responsibility for being a dad rather than expecting society or someone else to tell you how you should to do it.Anyone that wants kids needs to suck it the fuck up and be parents and not let society dictate or preach to them how to do their job.
Just because you didn't personally address anybody in the previous quotes, doesn't mean that they weren't personal attacks. If anything, they were attacks on the people planning the convention, and also insults to those who are anticipating attending the convention. I didn't see one personal attack against you from Wolf, just a disagreement. What did you expect in reply to such an aggressive post?
Your argument falls flat anyway. People attend so that they can be better parents and meet people, not because they need someone to tell them how to raise their kids. You might as well say that people who attend gaming conventions need someone to tell them how to play video games. Maybe they just want to meet other gamers, learn new tricks or whatever, and get out of the house for some fun.
..........................................
http://www.altparenting.com
new here with a question
hey guys, i dont want to get inot the middle of this "should or shouldn't convention" argument...i mean I just signed up on here 5 minutes ago...but I had a queestion. How do I change my password from the one given to one I can remember? Please help and thanks for you time.
.
The entire convention is a sore spot for me, and I apologize for being so aggressive about it. Anyone who actually knows me and knows my daily ordeal understands, everyone else can just stuff it.
ticktock wrote:
Maybe they just want to meet other gamers, learn new tricks or whatever, and get out of the house for some fun.
If this is the case with the convention, why hide it behind the guise of something to make you a better dad? Why not advertise and direct it as just that, a get together for SAHDs by SAHDs? I want AHDCon to succeed, really I do, and I'd love to attend, but something needs to happen. Looking at it's thirteen year history, it's never been a great success for the community as a whole, and attendance is lackluster. I don't mean to come off as an asshole in this, but look at it from this perspective: BlogHer started in 2006 with more than 300 attendees it's first convention, has AHDCon even come close to that number? And that's just attendees, not attendees and their families like some of the more attended AHDCons. In all seriousness, were I able to attend, aside from Dr. Rochlen's research, this is the only thing I'd want to discuss. How to take the AHDCon from a trickle of dads on a wine tour, to something that actually could do some good for the community and society as a whole.
-Will
gamingwithbaby.com | all your diapers are belong to us
my flickr
BRING BACK THE IRRELEVANCE!!!!
Whoa! Down Boy!
I think you're way out of line (and out of touch) in giving your opinion about the convention. This event (regardless of the numbers) has done a lot of good for the dads who have attended.
Your comments about the convention and its lack of importance is insulting to me and especially to the hard working dads who have put their time, heart and soul in organizing and conducting this event for the last 13 years. Furthermore, the creation of the At-Home Dad Convention is one of the main reasons there is such a strong contingent of at-home dad networks today.
I have met many wonderful, amazing, caring, dedicated, faithful, funny .....dads at the eight conventions I've attended. I have many fond MEMORIES and LAUGHS of time well spent with them. And I'm a better husband and dad because of them. They are my heroes. (Get it Hogan's Heroes)!
See ya in Sacramento guys.
Hogan, Proud Convention Attendee
Quote:The entire convention
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The entire convention is a sore spot for me, and I apologize for being so aggressive about it. Anyone who actually knows me and knows my daily ordeal understands, everyone else can just stuff it.
So...are we "stuffing it" or getting an apology? :-)
I think what you're missing is that the main point of the convention for most people is the social and networking aspect - simply hanging out with a decent number of other at-home dads is refreshing and pretty much impossible to do outside of something like the convention.
There is also some useful information that you can pick and choose from. You don't have to do what anyone says. Be your own parent. Lots of people enjoy the social aspect of the convention and getting a break, others like the info. Pick and choose whatever you want.
If you'd like to see the convention be something bigger/better/regional/different, I'm sure that any time, effort, or money you'd like to contribute would be welcomed. The guys that organize the convention put a lot of effort into it, while still taking care of the rest of their lives. Whether the result is ideal or not, they do the best that they can - which is a great job. Their efforts should be appreciated.
Out of curiosity, have you ever been to any of the conventions?
Proud Convention attendie
Well Gents,
I for one will not get to attend the convention this year. And I am disapointed. I don't expect to see someone that comes off as so close minded as GWB at convention,,, nor would I probably enjoy having him in my hair braiding class,,, as I did all the other guys in said class in KC. Yes I do take offense,,,, if it was so easy to do,,, i wouldn't have made a very good living braiding along with hairstyling and cutting hair for 13 years. I agree with Hogan that the past conventions I have attended,, along with the fun and camaraderie,, have left me a better husband and father. I hope the guys reading GWB's tyrade will take it for what its worth and still consider going after hearing the encouraging words from guys like me,,,, that have experienced the convention,,,and so are speaking from experience.
I highly encourage any guy that has the opportunity to attend. I attended my first convention with the attitude that if I walk away with even one item that helps me,,,,, it was worth it. I have not been disappointed!
Have a great time at convention,,,, wish I was there with you all.
Nope
If it wasn't so darn far from home I'd consider it. I'd like to meet you guys in person, have a few beers, learn something new. I learn a lot from other people about raising my daughter just from the forums. Maybe there will be one closer to Detroit in the future.
Rich C. : Novice baby wrangler and cat herder.
http://one-sahd-dude.blogspot.com/
http://good-eats-fan.blogspot.com/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/onesahddude/
From the convention organizer.
I don't claim to be an expert on being an at-home dad. That's not why I stepped in to be organizer 3 years ago. I went to my first convention before my son was even born, to see what I was getting myself into.
The sessions and the content of the sessions (at that time) were almost irrelevant. I didn't even have a child at that point, so I had no clue what these guys were all talking about. I went to pick the brains of the guys who had been at home with their kids. I wanted to know what their day was like, and how they got through until their wives got home from work. That was what was important for me. As for the 5 conventions since then? I went for the commeraderie. I went for the break from my job. I went to see my friends that I only ever got to talk to online, and have a beer with them when the day was done.
I've spent my time this year with my son, back working outside the house again, and trying to put together this convention. I'm sorry you feel that youtube would be a better way to spend your time. I'm sorry you feel that the current program content offers nothing to you. And, I'm sorry for whatever it is in your life's situation that has you feeling as you do. But to take it out on the convention, my efforts in planning it, and the efforts of those who have given their time to help me, is just wrong.
That being said, if you haven't been to a convention, and you haven't experienced the convention, you don't know what you are missing. I went to a session in one of the Chicago conventions that was supposed to teach us how to bring out creativity in our kids, and we ended up folding paper airplanes. It wasn't about the sessions, it was about talking to the guys around you while folding that airplane learning what they did with their kids that was something that you might be able to do to make your own day easier. And if you feel the online community is enough for you do be able to do that, fine, and so be it.
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All basic jobs of being a parent, and honestly if you need someone else to tell you how to do anything for your child, then you probably shouldn't have had kids in the first place. Take responsibility for being a dad rather than expecting society or someone else to tell you how you should to do it.
When I became a parent, nobody handed me an owner's manual. Wouldn't having the portion of society responsible for teaching us "how to do it", be the reponsible thing to do as a dad?
For those who have never been to a convention that are reading all of this, my first convention was a life changing event. I went to see what I was getting myself into. It was the best thing I could have ever done to prepare myself for being an at-home dad, or even being a dad for that matter. I walked into a room of guys who were proud to show pictures of their kids, and share their experiences, and who offered support and advice if needed. I left with a great sense of "I can do this", and I also left with a great contact list of new friends I could call if I was having issues, or needed a suggestion of how they handled a situation with their kids that I could apply to my time at home with my own son.
Ask around, you'd be hard pressed to find any previous attendees who didn't enjoy themselves during the convention weekend. Even if they didn't like the sessions, having a break, and getting some down time with other dads who understand what your day is like is a refreshing experience.
I hope to see you all in Sac in November.
Dayv,
Organizer
11-13th Annual At-Home Dad's Convention
You are too angry
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I don't mean to come off as an asshole in this
Well you do! Whether there are pertinent topics at the convention or not, it just doesn't matter. Part of the convention, from what I gather, is to help SAHD feel comfortable with their chosen path. Based on your previous comments I can already hear you say, "Well if they are not comfortable with being an AHD, then stuff it."
Dude, sounds like you have been through some serious shit, based on other posts I have read. You need to get a hold of your anger. Maybe a session on anger management would be reason for you to attend.
not this year
I'm not gonna be there. Too far away. Having attended business conferences in my previous life, I agree that at least half the utility of these events is the camaraderie, not the panels you attend. Maybe next year.
Instead, I'll be with my wife and a buddy of mine and his wife living it up on a rare trip to NYC. I'm sure we'll fit in some parenting discussions around the eating, drinking and sightseeing!
Dave, full-time child roadie for Owen and Amelia
www.davebrigham.com
Oh geez
This is exactly why I've stopped coming over here. This is the first thread I've read after a week away and it's such a disappointment to see. I'm thinking someone should just go stomp on some bunny rabbits or something. I'm going to suck it the fuck up and leave it at that, but there really is a lot of unnecessary aggression around here.
Anyway, I am not attending, although I would like to, just because of the distance. We did have a nice little NC dads get together earlier this year courtesy of Mr. Barbera. While we didn't have formal discussions like the kind Dayv has planned, just hanging out and drinking with other guys AND talking about our kids was refreshing. Well, until Greg hurled, but at least it was on his deck and not mine.
don't sweat it guys...
If GWB doesn't get it and obviously doesn't want to get it, that's fine. Let him sit stew with his own opinions and judgments about the convention. They only define who he is, not who you are, or I am, so don't worry about it. Just move on.
I'm going to the convention and have gone to many conventions in the past.
to point out GWB's comparison to AHD convention vs. Blogher convention...you might want to compare apples to apples. Women who blog seems to be a much wider range group than the niche that is the at-home dad community. Women who blog may as well be called "book club" for all intent and purposes for the common-ness of it. Was there a "men who blog" convention that you can compare numbers with?
That, plus you are full of complaining about it, but not really offering to much to improve on it. What are you willing to do to improve the attendance at the convention? If your answer is nothing, then please stop complaining about it. I can say that your cynicism and lack of constructive criticism on the subject certainly doesn't help.
If you think you can "get it all" from you tube, AtHomeDad.org and other dad websites and not come out from behind your computer screen, then I gotta question what kinda person you are. OK, sorry, strike that last comment, maybe not but...There is SO MUCH you are missing by not having the face time and interacting with other at-home dads and getting "all of this" than sitting in your chair safe in your home face aglow from screen "getting all of this". It just doesn't compare.
I totally get the money and distance thing and that is why there is what you call "the traveling road show". I'd explain more, but you truly don't seem interested, so I won't waste my time.
I hope you'll find peace with the convention someday!
lol!
Won't make it...
...but I'm looking forward to another year when I will be able to make it. I'm relatively new to the site and would really enjoy some face time with guys and a chance to get away to reflect and regroup, but I'm in the "just too far club." In my case, "too far" has nothing to do with where in the country it is...we're overseas for a couple of years. Take a lot of pix and video if you would, please!
Cheers
Hey, Lucky...
Sorry you can't make it!
I know some of the guys do a live-blog kind of thing from the convention. I think many of the guys post pics to Flickr pretty quickly during the convention. If I bring my laptop I know I will do the same and post the link here when I do.
To address the "traveling roadshow" comment of this thread, the convention looks to be held in cities like Austin, TX, Washintgton DC, Minneapolis, MN and Denver, CO to name a few. These are towns that boast strong at-home dad communities that have expressed interest in hosting the convention. This can keep it "central" to many dads around the country, make it easier for them both physically and financially to get to, if that may be an issue.
Brian
Good Grief!
All I did was ask who was going and who wasn't! I think I'm going...have been saving for it since the last convention. I'm really disappointed that some of the guys I've really gotten to know last year (and over the last year here on line) aren't going this year, but hopefully will meet another bunch of interesting guys. I hope many of you guys do show up. By the way, JonMcP...I'm sad to hear that you aren't going. I was looking forward to finally meeting you!
Check out my ramblings on life at http://www.sahdguy.blogspot.com/
Rotating Sites
I have been to 4 or 5 of the conventions, both in Chicago and Kansas City. I woudn't trade my weekends at the conventions for anything, especially the first 2 when I was newer to the whole Stay At Home Dad thing and NEEDED support, camaraderie, and help.
Last year we moved from the mid-west to the east coast. At that point, I really started to look positively at the "traveling roadshow" concept to conventions. I will be skipping this years, and I am sure the organizers knew that moving it to the coasts would both cost them some attendees (i.e. myself for example) but gain them others (locals on the west coast who never traveled to the mid-west).
I am so looking forward to next years convention, in the DC area I've been led to believe. Washington DC/Baltimore is an easy half-day's drive from I believe over 50% of the population of the USA. The number of stay at home dad's who will be able to make it to the site with less than a days drive will be tremendous. I look forward to that being a break-out weekend for the convention and the SAHD in the public eye. Heck, I'd like to help with the planning, logistics and all that if given the opportunity.
Everyone goes or doesn't go based on their own personal reasons. To be honest, I *could* have gone this year. But the reality is I have a 3.5 and 7.5 year old - I don't need to GET advice, help and such from 'you guys.' My kids are well behaved, eat well, go to sleep well and share properly. To go to another session on advice for newer dads on those topics or just to hang out with some of you for basically a day really doesn't warrant the airfare and time commitment. More locally next year, I'll meet yuinz in a heart beat!
So as all you Cubbie fans can say with me, "wait till next year!"
Cheers,
PittCaleb
Sadly, not this year . . .
Was living in CA until a few months ago and I was definitely going then. This summer brought on a new job for my wife with lots of weekend work and a move out of California.
Went to two conventions in Chicago and they were educational and fun. I'd highly recommend it to anyone who hasn't been, especially if you're feeling isolated or in an area with few AHDs.
Have a beer (or wine cooler) for me in Sac!
Jim
Yup, I'll be there
Phew, seems like we've gotten this thread back on track...
Yup, I'll be there. Looking forward to it...and to seeing all you clowns!
- Andy
____________________________________
13th Annual At-Home Dads' Convention: www.athomedadconvention.com
Looking Forward To Sac Town
I am another one who is looking forward to seeing everyone that will be able to make it to Sacramento this year. For those who are not able to be at the convention, I know that I will miss seeing you again if we have met before and sorry for not being able to meet some of the other dads that are a part of this board.
GWB, it is about the camaraderie and spending time with others that do the same thing that you do. Unfortunately society in this country still has a hard time with the At Home Dad and seem to be afraid of At Home Dads. The break-out sessions are what they are and the people who host the sessions put a lot of time and effort into them to present things that newbies may not have thought about before. Even some of the old timers may be able to express that they put up a thing or two that they forget as time goes by.
This will be my second convention in the last three years and I look forward to additional information that I will be able to obtain for myself. Before flaming the efforts of the organizers, attend a convention and see what the convention has to offer. You will be definitely surprised by what you experience.
No Problemo!
And in the efforts of joining the (ehem..cough,cough) 21st century and filling cyber-space with some more mindless drivel...I thought I'd be cool like the the rest of you bloggers and get a blog of my own going.
No, seriously, I actually did want to get this going for a number of reasons. One of them was to know how to post commentary from the convention. It's really freakin easy and there are so many different software packages to use.
Anyway...
I started my "ramblings", mindless drivel" "rants" digressions" "stories" "ideas" "convention postings" here...
http://web.me.com/homedaddy/Site/Blog/Blog.html
I'd mentioned it to my wife
I'd mentioned it to my wife a while back, but it'll take some creative financing that we just can't do right now.
I am one of the organizers for a Geocaching event that has around 2000 attendees each summer. Our big event is in stark contrast to another that has gotten much larger. Our event stays as close to where Ohio, Indiana, and Michigan meet as we can get because we started this thing as a way to bring those states together. The larger event has moved each of the last four years. It's just a matter of style. There's no city that is cheapest for everyone to get to (but I would recommend sticking with Amtrak stations these days) and it seems like a national group can gain some die-hards by moving an event around to areas where there are more fresh attendees.
We also have information sessions at our event. Some of the sessions are popular and others are not. They all have rave reviews, though. Even the popular ones only have about 150 people at them. But our party zone, Area 51, always draws 500+ over the course of each night. We took the opportunity to add some learning to the event, but we know that it isn't the reason anyone comes.
I really wish I had a chance to make it out there. I'm sure you'll all have a good time.
Take care of you
I will be there is Sac Town and I hope many of those on here are willing to make the sacrifice too. It's amazing how much better you can feel about yourself when you meet someone, face to face, that is in the same boat as you. We are a rare breed as at home dads and no one else understands it quite the same. So what if you don't want to learn how to sew or already can braid hair, that's not why you're coming anyway. You are coming to be with your people, to not be judged, to laugh and maybe learn a new parenting trick or two. It's just like the airline safety video that tells you to put your oxygen mask on first and then your child's: Take care of yourself so you can take care of your kids.
The convention is one great way for you to take care of you.
KCHOMEDAD, now in Omaha
Aaron Rochlen,
Hi everyone,
I'm really sorry that the conference this week isn't going to happen in full, as originally planned. I was really looking forward to it. I hope to participate next year - wherever it might be. I also appreciate the many kind comments on this forum regarding some of my research. I recently posted a summary of a new project looking at reasons for becoming a SAHF, experiences of stigma, and workforce re-entry plans. Check out the "current studies" link under research if interested. Hope soon to be analyzing a new study on wives of SAHFs.
All the best,
Aaron
Aaron Rochlen, Ph.D.
Counseling Psychology
http://aaronrochlen.edb.utexas.edu
Joined: 2007-09-28
Dad Points: 510